


Collision Course

by Spencer_B



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Allergies, Angst, Crossover, Eating Disorders, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Multi, Tarsus IV
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-26
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-09 18:32:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13487280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spencer_B/pseuds/Spencer_B
Summary: Leonard McCoy had seen a lot of things in his lifetime. This however was new. Sure he knew about alternate realities and he had met Ambassador Spock but he hadn't expected to see himself in his medbay! Along with another Kirk and another Spock. He can already feel the stress headache coming on.At least they're asleep for now.





	1. Waking Up

Leonard McCoy had seen a lot of things in his lifetime. The stranger ones had occurred more recently, caused in part by Jim Kirk and his tendency for hairbrained schemes and rule breaking. This however was new.

It wasn’t like he didn’t know about the alternate universe. He’d met Ambassador Spock before he’d died, in various capacities. He just hadn’t expected for the alternate universe to dump three bodies on the Enterprise with not even a ‘how do you do’. Said bodies were, thankfully, alive but currently unconscious for reasons he still couldn’t explain. Nothing about their health said they should be on the bio-beds still and yet here they were.

He frowned, looking over at the _other_ _Jim_ again. He was stockier and shorter, softer in the face, with faint crow’s feet around his eyes. All of the _others_ were older, but it shocked him most to see it on Jim for some reason. It wasn’t really like looking in a mirror. He could tell that this was Jim, but he looked more like an older brother or cousin and less like an alternate double.

But then it came back to the oft-debated question of nature vs nurture. These people had different lives, different experiences, it had shaped them in strange ways. Strange to him at least. How dissimilar their lives were remained to be seen, seeing as none of them had woken yet, and he could only hope that a fight wouldn’t occur. If he knew _his Jim_ (and Leonard liked to think he did, having lived with him for three years at the academy and then more on the ship) someone was bound to start a fight unless he prevented it. He sent out a prayer to whatever holy deity there was that the _other Jim_ was less confrontational than his own.

He would like them to wake up though. It was unnerving. Looking at _yourself_ passed out. This was why he’d been avoiding the other McCoy, who looked about as grumpy as himself even in his sleep. Perhaps this is what Spock had felt like looking at the Ambassador. Or perhaps not. Knowing the hobgoblin he wouldn’t have felt much of anything about it.

No. Surely even Spock found it a little strange to look at his own, _different_ , face.

“Bones! Are they awake yet?”

He startled a little at the loud voice, turning to scowl at Jim who had managed to sneak up on him yet again. Honestly, the kid was louder than anything until he _wasn’t._ Leonard was going to get him a bell.

“No, Jim, they ain’t awake yet, as you can clearly see. An’ if they were I would have told you.” Jim honest to God pouted at him and Leonard raised an eyebrow. There wasn’t much he could do about their visitors not being awake, other than wait.

Of course, Jim wasn’t patient at the best of times. He clearly wanted to talk to _other Jim_ , if the half wistful, half nervous looks he kept sending at the man were indicative of anything, but it didn’t look like that was going to happen any time soon.

“Can’t you like hypo them awake?” Jim was bouncing a little on the balls of his feet, staring at Leonard like he’d just suggested something reasonable and not completely ridiculous.

“Are you an idiot?” Someone beat him to the reply. A gravelly voice, one that screamed ‘I’ve just woken up and I’m not happy about it’, and he turned to look at _himself_ , who was groaning as he shifted to sit up. It wasn’t his voice but it was close enough to be uncanny.

“Bones, he’s awake!”

“I can see that, idiot. Thank you for stating the obvious”

“Where the hell am I?” Their (somewhat playful) argument is broken by _other McCoy_ who has, in the interim, begun to climb out of bed. Leonard notes that he’s thinner and shorter, wearing what he assumes is a medical tunic with short sleeves and a wide collar. It doesn’t look like any uniform he’s ever seen in Starfleet, almost old fashioned in its style.

“You’re in an alternate dimension, from what we can tell. Not sure how you got here, Spock is trying to figure it out still.” Jim is speaking before he has a chance to reply, grinning wildly, looking excited to finally talk to one of the _others_ but Leonard has more important things to worry about. Like the fact that a man who was incapacitated two minutes ago is now trying to get up.

He scowls and all but shoves past Jim to try and push the man back into bed, standing by his side so he can’t leave.

“Get back into bed.”

“I don’t need to be in bed, I’m not an invalid.” It’s not really surprising that he complains, Leonard knows that he isn’t the best person to have as a patient, but its still annoying. Especially when _other McCoy_ slaps his hands as he tries to put him back in the bed. “Oi get your hands off me!”

“Bones, he’s almost as grumpy as you!” Jim is laughing behind him and he scowls, flipping his middle finger up at him without looking back.

 _Other McCoy_ grimaces at the sound of the name and once again tries to swing his legs out of bed.

“Dear god, you’re stuck with that nickname as well?” It isn’t comforting to know that he’s saddled with _Bones_ in ever universe. _Other Kirk_ might not be so different after all. It only makes Leonard worry even more about when he wakes up.

“Unfortunately. Now will you please get back into bed so I can check you!”

“I don’t need checking, kid. I’m fit as a fiddle and I’ve been doctoring a hell of a lot longer than you, by the looks of it.” Leonard scowls at the insult and bites his tongue. Being rude to Jim when he’s a shit patient is one thing, but he should probably at least try to be _nice_ for himself.

“And you’re still my patient, so you’ll do as I say!”

“The hell I will! I don’t need treatment from someone who barely looks old enough to hold a tricorder!”  

“Stop being a shit! Just let me check, goddamn old man!”

“Has anyone ever told you that your bedside manner sucks?” Jim bursts into another peal of laughter, this one louder than the first.

Leonard actually turns around to glare at him this time and he is pleasantly surprised when Jim actually _shuts the fuck up_ , though a little confused as to why. At least until he notices that _other McCoy_ is also glaring at him.

“I’m just… gonna go.” Jim mumbles before all but running from the room, making _other McCoy_ snort and roll his eyes.

He is also stood up on the other side of the bed and Leonard contemplates pulling his hair out but ultimately it seems he is fighting a losing battle. He’ll just have to keep an eye on himself. And if he faints or something at least Leonard has the last word. ‘I told you so’ always tastes sweet.

“So, another alternate dimension. Least this one seems nicer than the last. Even if they look like they’ve barely left the Academy.”

 _Other McCoy_ is talking to Kirk – the one that’s still asleep – and Leonard frowns at his words. At least it explains why the man isn’t freaking out. If they’ve encountered other realities before they at least know it _can_ happen. He does wonder what the other reality McCoy is talking about might have been like but its probably better not to ask.

“You’re an awful patient but you could at least respect me. I might not be as old as you but I’m still a damn fine doctor.” Is what he says instead, making _other McCoy_ laugh abruptly as he turns to face him.

“I’m sure you are, kid, I’m just used to bein’ the one in charge.”

He can understand that. This is _his_ medical bay after all. In some ways it is McCoy’s too. Leonard nods and sits back down at the desk, glancing over at _other Kirk_ and _other Spock_.

McCoy frowns, brushing a hand over Kirk’s hair, looking worried and fond. It is visible in the minute crinkling of his eyes, the soft sigh that most would take for exasperation. This man might be older than him and different in many ways, Leonard thinks, but he can see how they are the same. Those actions, speaking far louder than his words ever had, those are the same.

“I’m sure he’ll wake up soon. He ain’t Jim Kirk if he doesn’t.” Leonard finds himself speaking before he really knows why. It makes McCoy look up and roll his eyes, standing up straight again.

McCoy quirks his lips up in a half smile and nod, coming to lean against his desk and look curiously over it.

“I’d say you’re right about that.”

“Of course I am.” He fights the urge to bat McCoy’s hand away when the man picks up a hypo, looking at it curiously.

“Everything here is shiny. Y’all going for prettiest ship award or somethin’?” McCoy mutters after a moment, shaking his head as if the instrument has offended him in some way. “Jim’ll be jealous.”

Leonard doesn’t doubt that. It makes him feel a little strange. Their universe has changed in drastic ways and yet. He doesn’t finish the thought, brushing it off as quickly as it came.

“Put that down would you.” Is what he mutters instead.

“I know how to handle a hypo, kid.” McCoy tells him, raising an indignant eyebrow as if Leonard has forgotten he has years of medical training.

Truthfully, he does forget. He’s so used to it being Jim coming in and fiddling with his stuff that he just reacts automatically. He’s a little precious of his Medbay and everything that sits inside of it.

“Ain’t that.” Is all he says in reply, shaking his head absently. McCoy frowns but doesn’t pressure the subject. Small mercies the universe grants sometimes.

They sit in silence for a while, McCoy pulls a chair up and sits between _other Spock_ and _other Kirk_ , watching them with bright, serious eyes. He shifts whenever one of them moves or makes a sound but neither look like they’re going to wake up soon. Leonard is surprised that McCoy woke up so fast.

When he mentions this to McCoy the man rolls his eyes again, “How am I supposed to sleep with Jim Kirk whining?” he replies and that’s fair, really. Still, Leonard wonders if it’s the same ingrained reactions he has. The same need to make sure Kirk is okay because the man has a way of getting into trouble in an empty room.

He doesn’t voice these thoughts.

“So, can I get somethin’ to eat? I know my Mama didn’t raise me to starve my guests.”

Leonard glanced up from the PADD he’d been working on and snorts, leaning back in his chair. When he glances at the clock he notes that lunch would probably be a good idea.

“All you had to do was ask, darlin’.” He’s teasing before he realises who this is that he’s talking to and he tries to ignore the hot flush that spreads up his neck.

McCoy only laughs though and stands, back cracking in a way that makes Leonard wince. He really doesn’t want to get old.

Not that McCoy is really that old. Leonard thinks it’s the attitude more than anything. The way his shoulders slope like there’s some heavy weight on him. Probably due to Kirk (and honestly, Spock is just as bad), and some of their ‘adventures’. Leonard’s gone through hell and back multiple times and they’re barely into the five year mission. He wonders what shit McCoy has seen.

Once again it seems better not to ask.

“Chapel, can you come watch our guests. I’m going to lunch?” He Comms her because out of all the medical staff Christine Chapel is probably the one he trusts the most. He doesn’t mention that _other McCoy_ is awake and she doesn’t ask. If she’s surprised that he’s taking his lunch break for once she doesn’t let it show in her reply.

He’s always been of the idea that showing someone is easier than telling them and quicker to. Why explain that McCoy is awake when Chapel will see so when she arrives?

“Christine Chapel. Best goddamn nurse I’ve ever had.” McCoy looks pleased to hear the name and when he speaks it is half a statement, half a question. A subtle inquiry into her status here.

“Ain’t she just?”

He is glad to note that no matter what universe, Christine Chapel remains his best nurse. Chapel has always been a good friend to him and she knows just when to call him on his shit. It is a quality of hers that he has always admired.

Apparently, McCoy feels the same way because he greets her politely when she enters, southern charm seeming to radiate off him. It is a stark, almost hilarious contrast to how he’d treated Jim (and Leonard) but he isn’t mad. After all one should always treat a smart lady well.

Christine, bless her, looks neither shocked or annoyed at either of them. It gives Leonard the slightest bit of hope that perhaps everything will be okay despite their unexpected guests.

“Thanks Chris, I don’t think they’re gonna wake up soon but call me if they do. We’ll only be in the mess.”

He gestures with his head towards McCoy as if to indicate who he’s going with and she gives him a flat look. In hindsight that may have been unneeded but at least he’s being clear.

“Of course, Dr McCoy.” Her voice is soft and agreeable, but he feels like he might have accidentally insulted her. Suddenly nervous he gives her a charming smile and only jumps a little when McCoy slaps him upside the head, leaning on his toes in order to reach.

“I’m sure Chapel knows how to do her job without you micromanaging, kid.” McCoy tells him with a roll of his eyes.

“Thank you, Doctor.” Chapel says, turning away from both of them, and Leonard is 99% sure its only to hide a smile and a roll of her own eyes. Goddamn doubles and sarcastic nurses. Why is his life never easy?

“Alright, alright. Sorry Chris. Just a bit on edge. I’ll see ya in a bit.” Its more of a question than a statement, hanging in that in-between and for a moment he isn’t sure how Chris is going to react until she shakes her head.

“Go get lunch, Len, for once in your life.”

He takes it as the apology it is and grins at her, gesturing for McCoy to follow him as they leave the Medbay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might have noticed but for now AOS!McCoy will be referred to as Leonard whilst TOS!McCoy is McCoy. TOs and AOS Jim call their respective doctors Bones.  
> 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are always complications.

Jim wakes up with a pounding head and the realisation that he is going to be sick right this second. It’s gross, he feels like shit, and it takes all of his energy to throw his head over the side of the bed, so his mess hits the floor. There is an aching pain in his side, like someone has stabbed him and the wound has been left to rot. His stomach clenches and he gasps sharply.

It hurts. For a moment he is lost in the pain. Kevin Riley’s five year old face flashes behind his closed eyes and he can’t even find the energy to blink, to chase it away. This isn’t Tarsus. This can’t be.

For one it smells unnervingly like a hospital. He hopes he isn’t in a hospital. This is a shit way to wake up, he decides. It rates close to dead last on his ‘ways to wake up’ list. He decides, in a brief moment of something close to hysteria, that he much prefers Bones doing that _thing_ with his tongue.

If only

He can’t spend much time thinking about that though, because there’s that sharp pain in his stomach and he’s vomiting again, even though he’s pretty sure there’s nothing left for his body to expel.

He aches all over, and he squeezes his eyes tight, seeing fuzzy light behind them. Bracing himself, he curls his hands into tight fists, and shakes as another wave of nausea rushes over him. It is dizzying in his intensity, taking his breath away (and not in a fun way). Jim thinks he’s going to choke. Maybe die. He can’t even cry out. He’s got to be quiet, if they’re found the kids will get hurt.

No, he’s not on Tarsus. He reminds himself of this but he can’t let it go. Every sound seems to get caught in his throat, burning. That’s probably acid, from throwing up, a semi-rational part of his mind tells him. Jim tells it to fuck off. It hurts. He doesn’t want to cry. He’s got to be strong because he’s the oldest and the Captain and there are guards out there.

Everything is blurring into one. He tries to open his eyes but that only makes the nausea worse, his head spinning. He’s got to be strong.

Distantly he thinks he can hear someone talking – it sounds almost like Bones but he can’t quite make it out. If Bones is here, everything will be okay, he tries to tell himself. Jim does his best to latch onto the words but the voice fades in and out and before he can even attempt to speak he finds himself slipping back into the darkness.

* * *

 

Leonard swears loudly. Kirk’s blood pressure has dropped a worrying amount. He almost fumbles, trying to grab the hypospray on his desk and feels like he’s back in med school for a moment, terrified of fucking up. McCoy doesn’t glance at him and he thanks the lord for small mercies because he doesn’t want to seem like an idiot and he certainly can’t afford to fuck this up. Instead, McCoy is fixing the IV, taping the needle to Kirk’s arm, watching him with a biting scowl on his mouth. Leonard can tell he’s nervous, its in the set of his shoulders and the line of his back. It’s most obvious in his eyes though.

He looks as if he’ll break into pieces if Kirk doesn’t make it and Leonard… Leonard has to be the one to make sure that doesn’t happen.

Leonard is being trusted with a piece of McCoy’s heart. He is being trusted to save Jim Kirk. It feels overwhelming all of a sudden but he knows he has to do this. He can’t imagine what it would be like to let Kirk die.

So he gives McCoy a nod and buries his own trauma and fear and heart ache as far down as he can. He’s a doctor, he reminds himself in his head, like a mantra. He can do this. He’s a doctor.

* * *

 

Everything had been fine until it wasn’t. It’s the way the world always works, Leonard has found. And he still hates it. For once in his life he’d like things to go fine and stay goddamn fine.

He’d taken McCoy to the mess and they’d ordered almost identical salads – the healthy kind that Jim would probably call tasteless, because he’s an idiot kid who lives off of burgers and pizza and is going to give himself a heart attack. Only McCoy’s had olives of all things in it, and honestly Leonard would rather hypo himself than eat an olive. They’re just all kinds of wrong. There’s healthy eating and there’s just plain wrong. When he’d told McCoy this though the man had rolled his eyes and muttered about him being ‘as bad as Jim’.

Which was completely untrue, because for one he was eating a goddamn salad and Jim Kirk would probably rather starve than eat any kind of salad. Every time Leonard tried to get him to eat one, Jim went on about ‘never again eating grass’ and Leonard told him off for exaggeration before Jim turned to his fries or burger and all but devoured them.

Pointing this out to McCoy only made him snort however and Leonard felt the inexplicable urge to pout. Or do something stupid like steal an olive just to prove he wasn’t like Jim, even though he hated olives with a passion.

…perhaps he was a little more like Jim than he liked to admit, but in his defence, he had lived with the man for three years and then some. One was bound to pick up habits.

He hadn’t pointed this out to McCoy though, because if the man was anything like him it would merely lead to more blunt teasing and sardonic looks. It was strange being on the other side of his own sarcasm and he found it hard to tell if he liked it or not. When they spoke it was similar, the accent, the dialect. McCoy would say something, and Leonard could only think about how _he was about to say that_. It was uncanny. A bit like having an older brother who knew you inside and out, knew your faults and traits but only because he shared them. McCoy wasn’t his brother though, he was him. Thinking about it too much made his head ache.

In response to that he only shoved more salad into his mouth and contemplated getting a peach for dessert. Not that the replicators did the fruit any favours. They tasted faintly metallic and just a shade wrong.

When he complained about this to McCoy he was pleased to note agreement to his statement. Most people told him he was being pedantic. Jim told him he was complaining about nothing – food was food right? Leonard called him an idiot in response and complained that Jim had no taste. He  only found himself frowning when the man complained –

“Least you can still eat ‘em, they’re on the Banned Food List after Jim went into anaphylactic shock from just being near one.”

Leonard isn’t exactly surprised to hear that Kirk has allergies in all universes. Not even surprised to hear about the ‘Banned Food List’ which clearly has capitals and emphasis on it. After all he has one of his own, tailored mostly due to Jim (and one Kevin Riley who had some strange allergies too). He is, however, surprised that _other Kirk_ is allergic to peaches because they are one of the few fruits that his Jim can eat. Peaches, apples, and bananas.

(He wonders when Jim became _his Jim_ and tries not to think about the phrase. It’s just a way to distinguish them, that’s all, he tells himself.)

“He’s allergic to peaches?” Is what Leonard actually says and then inwardly berates himself because isn’t that what McCoy had just said? Of course the man is allergic to peaches if he had an allergic reaction to eating them. Or well, in the case, being near them.

“Yeah. Guessin’ your Jim ain’t which is horribly unfair.”

“Mm. He’s allergic to a metric ton of other things though, you wouldn’t believe-“

“Oh I definitely would believe.” McCoy sounds deadly serious when he interrupts him, leaning back just a little in his chair. “Surprisin’ that their allergies are different though. Nature vs nurture in play.”

Leonard nods, frowning in thought. If anything it at least alerts him to the fact that he should most definitely do a full allergy workup on _other Kirk_ as soon as possible. He doesn’t want to be responsible for killing Jim Kirk, even if its not his own Jim Kirk. It would be the most ridiculous thing to happen and he can imagine it now. _Other Spock_ strangling him for it whilst McCoy tells him the best way to do it. Leonard grimaces at the image.

All the talk of doubles makes his head ache even more. He contemplates coffee and stimulants and decides, fuck it, he is getting peaches for dessert. He’s halfway to the replicator when his Comm goes off with a medical alert tone, loud enough to be heard even in the crowded mess. It makes him startle and swear and he’s only half surprised to see McCoy doing the same thing, having obviously recognised the call.

“Jim..!” The man barely breathes the word before shoving his way through the mess, and Leonard is quickly on his heels. Part of him wants to try, for once in his life, to be reassuring. There are other patients, it might not be Kirk.

The pit in his stomach seems to tell him otherwise.

It might not be Kirk, but if luck holds it most likely is Kirk. The thought sends a chill through him.

The medical alert continues to blare and he has half a mind to throw it across the hallway. It is only years of training and the need to get to the Medbay that stop him.

Seriously, who put the Medbay so far away from the mess? Leonard is gonna kill whoever made that design choice.

He skids to a halt in front of the door and drags on the medical scrubs as quickly as he can, tugging micro-thin gloves on. The moment he steps into Medbay his fear is confirmed – its Kirk. He’s flushed a brilliant red across the face but the rest of him is deadly pale. The acrid scent in the room gives him a clear idea as to what has already happened. McCoy is already inside, dressed similarly, carefully stepping around the puddle of vomit to take Kirk’s temperature with a tricorder.

Who gave him that?

He doesn’t dwell on the thought for more than a moment because from what he can tell, Kirk is fading fast.

“Get me a hypo of ibuprofen, we need to bring the fever down. And start a drip of cooled saline.”

“You need acetaminophen, he’s allergic to ibuprofen.” McCoy calls, swearing loudly as the tricorder finishes scanning Kirk’s abdomen. “His appendix has ruptured, fuck, he’s going into septic shock.”

“Okay, we need piperacillin and tazobactam in a hypo, and IV fluids, prep for surgery, we need to get it out.”

He barely notices the nurses around him, McCoy shoves both hypo’s against Kirk’s neck, the man groaning slightly. Leonard feels vaguely sick but he pushes it away. From the way that McCoy’s hands are shaking it looks like he’s going to have to perform the surgery.

Kirk’s blood pressure plummets as they prepare to enter the OR, Leonard barely thinks as he grabs the hypo of epinephrine he keeps there for Jim. It slips against his fingers and he barely stops himself from dropping it with a cut off swear. McCoy is fiddling with the IV and he is about to press the hypo in when he realises that this Kirk might not be able to have epinephrine.

He barely gets the word out to McCoy before the man is nodding at him and he presses his thumb down quickly, twisting to change his gloves and scrubs as Kirk’s biobed is pushed into the OR.

Its fine, he tells himself. He’s a trauma surgeon for gods sake, he’s done this plenty of times. He brought Jim back from the dead!

Only, suddenly, he feels like this is going to be a hell of a lot harder, because McCoy is depending on him. He can’t even look at the man, _himself_ , he feels as if something would crack if he did.

He’s just got to focus. That’s all he can do.

Kirk groans and gasps for breath in a way that makes his heart stutter for just a moment.

“I need oxygen on him!” Leonard calls out, taking the tricorder and the small laser scalpel with a frown. Appendicectomies aren’t exactly common anymore. Most people have some time under an organ regenerator and take some antibiotics and are fine after. Jim Kirk, as always, seems to be an exception.

If anyone can do this it’s him though, Leonard tells himself, and he tries his best to believe it.

* * *

 

The surgery takes four hours. Of course, it does. This is Jim Kirk, there are _always_ complications. But he makes it.

Leonard is about ready to collapse by the end of it but Kirk is alive and stable for now, an oxygen mask on his face and an IV in his arm, but alive. McCoy sits stone faced by the side of his bed, his mouth set in a hard line. If his eyes are suspiciously red and puffy? Well Leonard isn’t going to say anything.

Instead he just drops his scrubs into the recycling unit and slumps at his desk. He feels like shit.

Kirk almost died. His heart stopped twice. It makes Leonard sick to think about, reminds him of the time that _his Jim_ was in a body bag. Just the memory is enough for his mouth to twist into an ugly grimace and make his stomach clench painfully. He has to move on. Jim is fine. Kirk is fine.

“Thank you.” McCoy’s voice is soft but it shocks him from his thoughts anyway. The man nods at him, Leonard can see that his hands are still shaking, he clutches at the edge of the bed as if to make up for the fact that he can’t touch Jim.

“You would have done the same.” The, _I could never let him die_ , goes unspoken between them. It echoes around the room, heavy in the air, but its true. There is no universe in which Leonard McCoy lets Jim Kirk die.

McCoy says nothing. He nods once, the movement of his head short and sharp, and he turns back to Kirk. The Medbay has been cleaned, it smells strongly of antiseptic spray to the point that he can almost taste it on his tongue. The bright lights make his head hurt, throbbing from stress and exhaustion.

Honestly, all he wants to do is go to sleep.

“You look like shit, kid.” He hadn’t noticed McCoy looking at him and he flushes slightly in response, embarrassed and annoyed at being called out.

“Why thanks.”

“I’m telling you to go to bed, idiot.”

“Has anyone ever told you your bedside manner sucks?” He snarks at McCoy, throwing his own words back at him. To his surprise McCoy only lets out a snort and shakes his head.

“Plenty of times, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m right. You need to sleep.”

That’s true but he can’t just leave. A thousand _what-ifs_ play around in his head.

“I’m fine.”

“No you’re not. Go. To. Sleep. Look, I’m a perfectly qualified CMO, if something happens I can handle it. You’re no use if you collapse from exhaustion.”

McCoy has a point but Leonard doesn’t have to like it. He scowls but stands up anyway, rubbing a hand through his hair. By this point its sticking up at all angles despite his best efforts so what’s the point in trying to keep it tame.

“Fine.” He all but bites out, shoving his chair in before he leaves. “Contact me if there’s any change.”

“Sure.” It’s a false promise. Leonard knows that McCoy doesn’t have a Communicator, couldn’t contact him even if he wanted to, but Leonard lets it slide. The promise is enough.

He nods and wipes his hands on his pants. He’s going to have to throw them away. It always happens after surgery, especially surgery on Jim. Not that he’s been in that position much but even once is enough.

Leonard feels very old and weary all of a sudden. He looks at McCoy before leaving the Medbay and studies the lines around his mouth, around his eyes, wonders if this is what fate has in store for him? McCoy looks tired and worried, he speaks softly to Jim, quiet enough that Leonard doesn’t hear him. He wonders how many times McCoy has seen Kirk lying on a biobed after yet another close encounter.

It leaves a bad taste in his mouth.

Perhaps this Kirk is less reckless, less foolhardy, perhaps he is settled in ways that _his Jim_ is not, Leonard tries to tell himself. This could merely be bad luck, horrible timing, a fatal flaw from falling through to another universe.

It isn’t comforting.

Leonard McCoy is a worrier. It isn’t always obvious, most people call him a grouch or a cynic. Spock has called him ‘overly emotional’ more times than he can count. It’s true that his bedside manner is abysmal and that he really can’t comfort people for shit but he doesn’t care as long as they’re safe. So, at his core he is a worrier, a deep need to make sure people are okay, are healthy, even if they don’t want to be. He wouldn’t be a doctor if he didn’t worry.

And right now he’s worried.

Scratch that he’s terrified and close to being out of his damned mind.

There’s nothing he can do about it. So he frets inside his head as he walks back to his rooms, pouring himself a generous glass of bourbon and swallowing it in one gulp. He has a bad feeling. Not necessarily about their guests, they seem nice enough. Leonard is scared of them.

He’s more scared of the future. It seems uncertain.

He has one more drink before passing out on his bed. There’s nothing he can do but wait and be there to fix things at the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> longer chapter this time with lots of angst,,,,
> 
> let me know what you think!!! i love comments and they keep me writing :D not sure when next chapter will be, should be soon ! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock isn’t sure how to feel about his elder self. He is strange, emotional, and confusing. It makes his head ache a little bit and he tells himself he is most definitely not attracted to Leonard McCoy.

Spock is disorientated when he wakes up and that is never a good sign. He estimates that he has been asleep for thirty-six hours and twenty-one minutes, if his body clock is working accurately. It is a shocking amount of time to sleep for, especially for a Vulcan and he surmises that something must have happened – he’s just not sure what.

The room he is in is not his own. It is much colder for one and it smells strongly of anti-bacterial spray. Around him he can also hear soft breathing and someone walking quietly in the distance.

The Medbay.

He comes to the conclusion that he has been injured and yet can’t remember what might of hurt him or how he got here. There is an eight-six percent chance that Jim is also in the Medbay if Spock has been hurt and this makes him narrow his eyebrows slightly as he thinks.

Jim will be fine. Dr McCoy will have helped them both, he always does. With that thought in mind he opens his eyes and sits up.

And immediately finds himself blinking at the brightness of the Medbay which he instantly recognises as not his own. It seems more modern than the one aboard the Enterprise, slick and shining slightly. Spock tenses, ready to be on his guard if needed, looking around the room.

He relaxes only minutely when he notices Jim in the bed next to him and McCoy between them, dozing lightly on a chair. Len is going to complain about his back if he continues sleeping like that, Spock thinks fondly to himself.

“Leonard… Dr McCoy.” Spock speaks softly – McCoy is a light sleeper and very aware of his surroundings. Jim is too unless he’s sure that they are safe. Spock feels warmly for them both and only worries a little when Jim doesn’t wake to his words along with Len.

“Spock! You’re awake! Finally, goddamn it, was beginnin’ to think you were gonna sleep forever. ‘Vulcans don’t need as much rest’ my ass.”

McCoy only groans a little when he stands and Spock lets himself be checked without protest – for now it is the most efficient way to do things. Spock has long since learnt not to fight McCoy about these things because the doctor is nothing if not stubborn.

“It is a physiological truth that Vulcans do not need as much sleep as humans, doctor. Perhaps you should check your medical books again if you have forgotten this fact. Are you sure that your memory is intact? It is a fact that humans experience memory degradation as they age.”

Spock speaks mildly and knows that neither one of them really means the teasing. Over the years it has become, what Jim would call foreplay, more than anything and it is comforting in its familiarity. McCoy is still the same. They are all here. These are facts that he can rely on.

“Shut up, Spock, my memory ain’t going. I ain’t that old!” Were Jim awake he would be delighted at this, Spock thinks. He allows himself a faint smile and pushes away the tricorder when McCoy goes to scan him again.

“I am perfectly healthy, doctor.”

“Like hell you are. You have a medical degree now Spock? You got your doctors license when I wasn’t looking?” McCoy waves the tricorder around slightly as he speaks and Spock feels a wash of adoration for the man in front of him. He can tell that McCoy has been worried, there are dark circles under his eyes and his hair is a mess. Spock notes that he is wearing unusual clothes – they are medical blues but they are a tight material that he doesn’t recognise. And there is no badge pinned to his chest.

Another mystery. He files it away, adding to the case he’s building inside his head. McCoy doesn’t seem scared, his usual worrying aside, which is a good sign. The best decision then is to continue as normal, Spock decides.

“I have not.” Raising his eyebrow elegantly he fixes McCoy with a stare and the man shakes his head in response. “I believe you know this, doctor, so asking is illogical.” He continues and McCoy waves the tricorder again, threatening to hit Spock with it. An empty threat and one that makes Spock want to smile at McCoy – he’s not going to. Not right now at least.

“Then you’ll sit down and let me scan you, dammit.” McCoy scowls at him but there is not heat behind his gaze and he has already put the tricorder down. Stubborn, Spock thinks, but fully aware of when he is fighting a hopeless battle. Spock resists the sudden urge to kiss him.

“I am fully aware of my own body, doctor. There is nothing wrong with me.” Instead, Spock stands out of bed before McCoy can protest any further and he most definitely doesn’t smile when it makes the man grumble.

“Goddamn stubborn son of a – just as bad as Jim, I swear to god. Wouldn’t be able to let me work unless I tied him down.”

“Do you wish to engage in the fetish of bondage, doctor?” Spock teases, his voice flat and even. It maes McCoy splutter and flush a brilliant red, the reaction pleases him more than it should, and he ducks away from McCoy when the man tries to smack him.

“Spock, you bastard! Don’t just bring that up!” When he looks Spock can see that McCoy’s eyes are glimmering and that he is happy.

“My parents were married at the time of my birth.” This too is familiar and comforting. They have had this conversation many times. “Furthermore, evidence suggests that you enjoy bondage, doctor, there is no need to be embarrassed by it.”

McCoy flushes again. Red is a decidedly good shade on him, Spock thinks.

* * *

 

Someone coughs behind them. McCoy’s head snaps up so fast that Spock winces despite himself and he spins around to face the source of the noise.

A Vulcan.

One who looks strangely similar. Younger than himself, Spock notes, dressed in Science blues. There is the faintest hint of green, high on his cheek bones and Spock feels faintly embarrassed at the sight of it.

It is almost like looking in a mirror but not quite. His mind is drawn back to the fairground that Jim had once dragged them too and the distorted reflections in the house of mirrors.

The Vulcan is taller, slightly thinner, but Spock is eighty-seven-point-nine percent sure that it is him.

Which confirms his theory at least.

“You are awake.” The man says at last, sounding slightly hoarse. Perhaps, Spock thinks with amusement, he is not used to emotions from a Vulcan, much less himself. Or perhaps it was the mention of bondage.

Spock has long since come to terms with his heritage as well as his sex life. It is not something he feels ashamed about anymore but this younger version of himself has likely not yet come to the same realisations.

“I am.” Is what Spock says in response, nodding and standing straight, looking _himself_ in the eye. “We are in an alternate dimension?”

“Yes. We are not sure how you came to be here, yet.” This is not particularly worrying. At least it is not _that_ universe, he thinks to himself. A younger, more emotionally repressed version is much preferred to any version of him with a beard.

“Fascinating. I appear to have no memory of what transpired before we arrived here.”

“This coincides with what Dr McCoy has told me.” Spock notices his younger self is steadfastly ignoring McCoy and McCoy (still red) is ignoring him back. His doctor has returned to watching over Jim, but Spock can tell that he has one ear on their conversation.

Spock nods at his counterpart, absently tapping his fingers against each other. It is a human movement that he has picked up over the years and he can see himself watching curiously. Some part of him is glad that he is not the only one to have lost time. Another part of him is worried about the fact that they have both lost time. He dislikes it when things play with his head.

“I will meditate on this and see if I can retrieve any memories of what might have happened.” Is what he says after a few moments of silence.

“You meditate?” His younger self seems surprised but Spock doubts he would admit it if asked. There is doubt and confusion underpinning his words as if he cannot reconcile Spock he has seen so far with the new information. Truthfully, Spock finds it almost adorable but decides it is probably best not to show that on his face. Instead he just raises a brow and he hears McCoy snort behind him.

“I am Vulcan, am I not? I meditate daily when it is possible.” Less so than he once had and the practice was made difficult, especially when Jim did _things_ with his mouth, but truthful. Unless they were in the middle of crisis (and didn’t that happen more than he would like) he meditated at least once a day.

“You are emotional.” This almost makes Spock smile. Spock – the younger one – is accusatory and confused. It is hard, Spock thinks, at that age. He is tempered by the years and by Kirk and McCoy but he remembers being so young and torn between the halves of himself. He looks seriously at Spock.

“I am content with myself. My emotions are tempered with logic but not supressed.” It is the truth. Spock has long since found balance within but he can’t give that to his younger self. Guidance and advice he can give but only Spock can achieve the balance.

“I see.”

Spock doesn’t believe himself for a moment but he nods anyway. Arguing would get them nowhere.

“May I use your room? There is an ninety-one percent chance that it is set to the climate of Vulcan, therefore making it more comfortable for our kind. This would in turn make meditation easier.”

“Your logic is sound – you are correct.” Spock looks over at Jim and back to his younger self before nodding.

“Please, contact me when he wakes.” He tells McCoy because he is worried about their lover and willing to show it.

“Of course I will, Spock. He’ll only bother me until he sees you otherwise.” McCoy is probably correct about this but Spock can tell he’s brushing off the question a little – is he still embarrassed about them being overheard? Or perhaps he just doesn’t want the other crew to know. Either way, Spock lets him do as he wish because he knows that McCoy will contact him and that’s the only thing that matters.

Younger Spock doesn’t comment on this and Spock is irrationally pleased. At least then, being protective over Jim Kirk, is a universal constant.

Instead he turns stiffly and doesn’t even check that Spock is following with a “I’ll escort you to my rooms.”

Spock gives McCoy and Jim one last, soft look, before following him from the room, leaving Jim in capable hands and only worrying a little.

* * *

 

Spock isn’t sure how to feel about his elder self. He reminds Spock of the Ambassador, both in form and in personality, just younger. There are things though that still surprise him. This Spock isn’t tempered by loss and grief – he estimates that Vulcan is still around for one, and he has Kirk still too.

Spock likes Jim Kirk. His own one at least, the elder Kirk is still sleeping. He woke only briefly due to medical emergency and Spock can’t really judge his personality based on that.

But yes – he likes Jim Kirk; the man has a sharp mind and is a frankly brilliant strategist when he isn’t being completely reckless.

Spock hadn’t liked him, not at first. He’d been furious about the Kobayashi Maru and the blatant disrespect and he’d been heartbroken and mad after and yet. Somewhere along the line he’d grown to like Jim.

He found himself unable to pinpoint precisely when his feelings changed. It is slightly worrying – he is Vulcan after all and precise details are in his nature, down to the very second. Leonard McCoy’s words – ‘there’s a fine line between love and hate’ – echo in his mind and he wonders if this is true. Emotions are cloudy and so fickle, in humans he finds they change like the wind (until, inevitably they don’t). On this matter, his own seem much the same.

It is hard to understand so he pushes the thoughts and the feelings down usually.

But this _other Spock_ is not like him.

He smiles, with his eyes if not with his mouth. He moves and teases and says things that are blatantly inappropriate for no reason that Spock can discern. It is illogical. McCoy – their McCoy – seems used to it, even encouraging it at times. The insults are still there, crass at times and humorous at others but they are softened by a warmer emotion.

Spock thinks that might be love.

It is confusing. He has never once been attracted to Leonard McCoy. The man is emotional to the extreme, his mind projects like no one Spock has ever met, he is crude, grouchy, and worries far too much. Physically he can be appreciated, Spock thinks, and there is no doubt that he is a good doctor, but Spock definitely isn’t attracted to him. He tells himself this firmly and with conviction.

This is just something different about their worlds, he decides.

* * *

The _other Spock_ is in his room. Spock isn’t suspicious, but he sets up an alert to tell him if the elder leaves anyway. It is just logical to monitor their activity on the ship. Jim would probably call him paranoid, but Jim is reckless and childish, more often than not.

Spock decides not to tell him about the alert. He should tell Jim that _other Spock_ is awake at least.

The Bridge is quiet today, which is one thing to be glad about, Spock supposes as he enters. They are travelling through relatively peaceful, mostly empty space and he hopes not to encounter any trouble.

“Captain, the elder Spock is awake, along with his McCoy. Your alternate is still sleeping, I am unsure as to when he may awaken.”

Jim frowns. Well, it is more of a pout, Spock supposes.

“Thanks Spock. Still no luck on the how?”

“Affirmative Captain. Neither Spock or McCoy can remember anything. The former is currently meditating to attempt to retrieve the memories but I estimate only a twelve-point-three percent chance of success.”

“Optimistic as ever, aren’t you Spock?” Jim rolls his eyes, Spock can see light reflecting off them, enhancing their colour. A recessive gene, the same as blond hair. Before coming to Earth, Spock had never encountered them before.

“I am drawing a realistic conclusion from the data, Captain.” His reply is short and overly formal. He knows that Jim wishes he would, in his own words, ‘lighten up a little’ but Spock has fought himself for so long. Sometimes he finds it hard to identify his emotions, even when he is feeling them deeply. They are foreign to him and unknown, leaving him with a deep sense of unease.

He speaks to Jim with a blank face and lets himself seem boring because its better than being _strange_ in his experience. Jim reacts as expected. For all he is emotional, Jim is also predictable in most scenarios. This is indeed one of them.

“Spock, I’m joking! Gods. So, what’s your counterpart like? I wanna talk to mine but apparently he’s going to be a regular Sleeping Beauty.” Jim sticks his tongue out like a child. Like a _human_ child, he amends, because a Vulcan child would never do such a thing. There is a petulant tone in his voice – he is whining, and Spock fights the urge to shake his head at the man. Instead he just raises an eyebrow and blinks slowly at Jim.

“I do not understand your reference, Captain. And to answer your question, he is… strange. More emotional than I. I believe that he is in a relationship of a romantic nature with _his_ McCoy and perhaps Kirk.”

Jim chokes on air (or his own tongue, it is hard to tell) and when he speaks it is more like a squawk.

“What now?!”

At least they are both as shocked by this information as each other.

“When I entered the room, they were discussing… bondage.” The word feels heavy on his tongue and he makes a sound of distaste. It is vulgar to discuss out loud and it is not something he has ever been interested in. Briefly he wonders if _other Spock_ feels the same or if this is another difference between them

He is certainly more at ease saying the word, if nothing else.

Jim’s eyes widen in a comical way it takes less than three seconds for him to burst into raucous laughter. Spock is unsure if Jim is laughing at him or at the _other_ him or both. He is going alarmingly red though and gasping for breath between his laughter.

Spock would worry about an allergy attack if he hadn’t been the one to cause this. This was a bad decision, he realises. Jim is never going to let him live it down, Spock is sure of this. There is a ninety-four percent chance that Jim is going to tease him about this until it gets annoying.

Perhaps he should just nerve pinch him now, while he still has the chance.

Spock is contemplating this idea when Jim’s laughter turns into coughing and he realises that is Captain has choked himself. He fights the irrational urge to sigh and smacks Jim twice on the back until he can breathe again.

“You are illogical. And an idiot.”

Jim is bright red and still wheezing a little bit. When he pouts at Spock there are tears in his eyes and he whines for sympathy. Spock just raises an eyebrow at him.

“That was a fit unbecoming of a Captain.”

“Shove off Spock, it was funny! You said bondage! So, the other you is kinky then?” Jim slumps back in his seat and he is still grinning wildly. When he says the word ‘kinky’ he puts an undue amount of emphasis of it and wiggles his eyebrows. Spock decides that he definitely does not like Jim Kirk and that he actually hates him.

“Inconclusive. Dr McCoy appears to be.” Is how he replies because if he can’t strangle Kirk on the navigation desk again he can at least through McCoy under the bus. At the very least it takes the attention off of him.

The distraction works.

“Damn, should have known it was Bones!” Jim whistles in a way that makes Nyota glare at him and grins. It is a filthy smile, the one that Spock has seen him using in bars and on dignitaries plenty of times in the past.

Spock never enjoys seeing that smile. He tells himself it is because it always gets Jim in trouble. That is the only reason.

“There is no evidence to suggest that our doctor engages in similar proclivities.” He tells Jim with a raised brow. Mostly because he wants to get _that look_ off Jim’s face as soon as he can. It is ridiculous. It makes him look like a lecherous child.

It works because the grin falls off with a dramatic sigh and is replaced with a pout. Jim huffs and shifts in his chair, leaning to rest his head on his hand.

“You spoil all my fantasies, Spock.”

Spock isn’t sure how to respond to that. It is likely (fifty-four-point-two percent chance) that Jim is joking. It is almost as likely that he is not.

“You are an idiot.” Spock repeats himself and turns away from Jim to look at his science console. It is the easiest and most logical escape route he can think of. He ignores the fact that Jim is probably pouting again.

The only thing he wants to do to Jim’s face right now is slap it, he tells himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally we get some spock! and a river in egypt ;) 
> 
> more jim next chapter? i hope so,,,,
> 
> as always I love comments <3 they keep me motivated to write so i encourage you to leave one, anything is fine :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock is not a brat. He doesn't care what the other McCoy says. These newcomers from another universe are a pain and they are wrong.

McCoy sighs and wipes a hand over Jim’s forehead. It is warm but no more than usual and he feels relief at the fact. Jim is a human heater at the best of times so the slight flush on his cheeks is to be expected. Of course, there are other ways to make Kirk flush that he much prefers but they’re not exactly _appropriate_ right now.

God, they better get a room on this ship if they’re gonna be here for any goddamn length of time.

He is mortified that _little_ _Spock_ had walked in on them discussing _bondage_. McCoy is going to kill his Spock the moment he has a chance. The fucking shit. It isn’t like McCoy is ashamed of his relationship (he hasn’t been since it started) but there is a time and a place for such talk. The bedroom, when no one else is around.

Jim would have wet himself if he’d seen that because he has no shame. In fact, he probably would have made things worse by going into detail. Both of his lovers are shits, McCoy thinks to himself fondly. It is a small mercy that Jim is still asleep, he tells himself with a snort, brushing blond hair out of his lover’s face.

The colour is darkening with age and McCoy can see the hints of tight curls in it. Kirk has always had wavy hair, but McCoy knows that for some reason he hates it. It is part of the reason Jim wears it so short most of the time and McCoy doesn’t pretend to understand why. Adorable is what it makes Jim, and he’s constantly confused as to why Jim is so self-conscious about it.

Jim has always been a proud man though. McCoy has likened him to a peacock more than once when Kirk is strutting around in his command golds. Kirk is always aware of his body, he works out religiously and never misses a meal. McCoy might tease him but there are times when this worries him because he _knows_ exactly why Jim is the way he is.

There are too many traumas to count, so McCoy doesn’t attempt to. The worst of it all dates back to childhood he knows.

In the beginning he had wanted to fix Jim, he’s a doctor, its what he does. If someone is in pain McCoy wants to stop them hurting. Now he knows better than to attempt because Jim isn’t his to fix. This isn’t a broken bone or a twisted ankle, there’s nothing he can really do. Being there for Jim is enough, loving him is enough. He can only offer his support because fixing Jim isn’t something McCoy can do. It’s not something Spock can do. It is something only Jim can do and as much as he loathes to admit it Jim doesn’t try. Not really.

Jim represses and pretends and hides the fact that anything is wrong.

He’s good at hiding it, McCoy will give him that, but you don’t love someone for as long as Leonard has loved Jim and not pick up on things. Subtle signs and problems. Len is Jim’s best friend, his lover, and his doctor. He is also _not blind_. He knows when something is wrong.

Mostly its food. Leonard tries not to think about why it’s food. And he doesn’t bring it up. Not if he doesn’t have to, because in his experience it just makes things worse. Jim panics or shuts down leaving McCoy and Spock helpless to do anything.

Right now, they can’t do anything. It’s another situation that McCoy hates. Waiting for Jim to open his eyes.

“Goddamit Jim, wake up for me, won’t ya, sweetheart?” McCoy hates seeing Jim like this. So weak and still. Jim is lively, he paces and talks with his hands. He smiles and recites poetry from centuries ago while looking at them like he and Spock had hung the stars.

Daft, old romantic. Jim Kirk is sap no matter what anyone else says. And a nerd. Even if he denies it, it is clear as the night sky to McCoy.

“C’mon idiot, we’re waiting on you.” Talking to Jim is irrational but McCoy can’t seem to stop himself. He’s terrified every time he sees Jim in the Medbay, always wondering if this will be the last time. If this time Jim won’t wake up.

Maybe he’s overprotective but McCoy doesn’t know how he’d live without Kirk. Or Spock for that matter.

“Don’t…. don’t call me ‘n idiot, Bones.” Jim cracks open his eyes and gives McCoy a weak smile. He looks tired and old. McCoy kisses him softly on the lips when he sees those brown eyes open and brushes his thumb over Kirk’s cheek.

“I’ll call you what I like, you goddamn fool. Almost gave me a goddamn heart attack, Jim.” McCoy doesn’t need to say _I love you_ , they both know that its hanging in the air around them. It is in every touch, word, look. It is in McCoy’s bad back from sitting in the Medbay instead of going to bed. _I love you._

“Mm, can’t get rid of…. Get rid of me that easily, Bones.” The words are slurred but McCoy is pretty sure that its just because of the pain killers. Jim winks at him and tries to smirk and McCoy rolls his eyes and can’t look away from him. “Where’s… Spock?”

He has become used to both of them being there when he wakes. McCoy kisses him again, on the cheek this time and hushes Jim.

“I’ll get him.” Jim nods at the reassurance and his eyes slip shut again. McCoy stares at him fondly before realising he has no goddamn idea how to get hold of Spock. Which is a problem because he promised Spock to get him when Jim woke up and he’s now promised Jim that he’ll get Spock. And truthfully, he doesn’t even know where the man is.

Fuck.

After all this isn’t their ship. Not really. It is the Enterprise, but for all that she is the same, she’s different. Newer. Shinier. McCoy is only half curious as to why because he knows what tends to force quicker development. _War._

He can hazard a guess as to where Spock might be, because if there’s one thing he’s learnt it is that alternate universes tend to be consistent, but he doesn’t really feel comfortable leaving Jim to go on a merry adventure to retrieve his wayward husband. Sometimes he is jealous of the mental bond Jim and Spock share because it would come in useful right about now, but he doesn’t dwell on it, looking between Kirk and the door with a frown.

Jim hates waking up alone. Its bad enough when he isn’t ill or injured.

And McCoy hates seeing Kirk upset even if he pretends like everything is fine.

He needs another solution. One that doesn’t involve him leaving Jim to potentially wake up alone. He’s dozed off again for now but McCoy knows Jim and he’s pretty sure the minute he leaves he’ll wake up. Alone.

And in a strange place.

Yeah that’s a recipe for disaster.

McCoy sighs and leans back a little in his chair, frowning as he thinks. Hopefully this Enterprise is similar enough to his own for this to work. If not he is screwed. And unfortunately, not in the literal sense.

“Computer, contact Spock. Ask him to come to the Medbay.” He’ll probably get the wrong Spock seeing as they’re not exactly on the system. Well, not _wrong_ , McCoy corrects himself. _Younger_ is probably a politer way to say it, but he’s never exactly been polite – unless it’s to a beautiful woman. Mama had taught him to at least be somewhat of a gentleman. To those that deserve it at least.

It’s the best choice he has at the moment. _Young Spock_ can at least retrieve his Spock without McCoy having to leave.

“Message sent and received.” The computer chimes back and its voice is feminine, slightly tinny. Familiar. He nods in response, as if the computer can see him and wonders why people always give them female voices.

* * *

 

Spock blinks when the message comes through. It has no automated signature on it which might have been worrying if he wasn’t fully aware of their unregistered guests.

Too aware of them.

McCoy (he assumes, there is a ninety-eight-point-four percent chance, considering the message asks for him to go to the Medbay) must have a reason to call him down though – if he is anything like the Leonard McCoy of this world.

So Spock goes, nodding to Jim as he leaves the Bridge because as much as Jim is a child at times, he is still Spock’s Captain. Not that he looks it right now. The man is still pouting, half sat, half slumped in the Captain’s chair, one leg crossed over the other. Spock feels something strange in his stomach at the sight, it is like heat clenching inside of him and it makes him want to frown. He can’t figure out what the feeling is, or even why.

Spock leaves the room quicker than is appropriate and does his best to ignore his body.

The tea he had at breakfast must have been bad, he decides as he walks through the halls of the enterprise. There is no other explanation for him to be feeling so strange.

* * *

 

The Medbay is quiet when Spock arrives. Not silent, there is the hum of machinery and quiet breathing. He can hear a few of the nurses speaking in the other room, chattering among themselves but they aren’t _loud._ As he expected, McCoy is still sat by Kirk’s bed, tapping his fingers idly against his own thigh as he waits. It is shockingly similar to the actions of Spock’s counterpart earlier and Spock tries not to think about the implications that arise when he realises this.

His alternate is obviously in a relationship with this McCoy, but Spock didn’t consider just how close they might be. Vulcan’s don’t usually date, but Spock already knows himself to be an exception to this. After all, he had dated Uhura, at least until they both decided it wasn’t working out. It had been a nice relationship, in his own opinion, but they are better off as friends.

He is eighty-four percent sure that Uhura has a crush on Christine Chapel now and he wishes her luck.

“You asked for me?”

McCoy jumps when Spock speaks and scowls at him. This is an illogical reaction, Spock thinks, seeing as McCoy is the one who asked him to come down here. Humans are hard to figure out. Despite having lived with them for years now they still confused Spock on a regular basis.

Out of all the humans he has had close contact with in those years McCoy is the most illogical, driven too often by his emotions and his stubbornness. This man is likely the same.

“Goddammit man, don’t sneak up on people like that!”  Spock raises an eyebrow and blinks at McCoy at the accusation. He hadn’t been intentionally trying to scare the other and he privately blames McCoy’s shock on the man being unobservant. Surely he knows that Vulcan’s move quickly and silently by now – especially if he is dating a Vulcan?

Spock tries to ignore the fact that the Vulcan in question is _him_.

(Why did Ambassador Spock never tell him about this?)

Ignoring the illogical urge to glare he turns to face McCoy better, speaking quickly with a clipped tone.

“I did not ‘sneak’. I merely entered in a quiet manner, so as to not disturb those who are sick and sleeping in the Medbay. Furthermore, you should have anticipated my arrival seeing as you asked me to come down here, did you not?”

 McCoy groans at this explanation and presses the palm of his hand against his forehead. Over dramatic in every universe, Spock decides, waiting for a reply.

“Well, I was tryin’ to get _my_ Spock but I ain’t got a Comm and neither does he, so you were the next best thing. Goddamn bastard.” Is what McCoy says when he finally explains himself. The last bit is muttered, as if McCoy is speaking more to himself than to Spock but Spock does have excellent hearing. He chooses not to correct McCoy and merely speaks tersely, wanting to leave.

 “Was there a reason for your communication?”

“Of course, there was a goddamn reason. Who do you think I am? I ain’t gonna go around disturbin’ people if there ain’t a point to it.” McCoy is excellent at avoiding the point, Spock realises. Defensive too, his arms crossed over his chest and his eyebrows both raised, as if he thinks Spock is an idiot for asking him this. Spock can see Leonard in the action and he would be the last to admit that it throws him off slightly.

“Perhaps you could tell me your reason then, Doctor?” He can feel a head ache bubbling behind his eyes and Spock bites back a sigh knowing that his meditation session is going to be long tonight. Not for the first time, he wishes that these men had never landed in his universe.

It isn’t that he dislikes this McCoy, or any of the alternates – they have done nothing the garner his disapproval and so it would be illogical to harbour ill feeling towards them. They are just making things _difficult_. Spock is _feeling_ things and he doesn’t like it. All he wishes is to do his work and continue the Enterprise’s mission. This goal, he thinks, is getting further and further out of reach.

He is distracted and that is exactly why the next word startles him so much.

“Brat.” Spock takes it all back. He does dislike this McCoy. Jim… Jim would understand if he nerve pinched this McCoy, wouldn’t he? Because Spock is feeling a very strong urge to do just that.

He is not a brat. Brat is a descriptor that may be accurate for Kirk but Spock is mature and intelligent and in control of himself.

He is _not_ a brat.

“Pardon?” His voice most definitely _does not_ break when he speaks because that would be unbecoming of a Vulcan. McCoy is pleased, Spock notes, grinning wide for a second in a way that makes Spock want to do unspeakable things, before he controls himself with a shake of his head. Horrible man.

McCoy shifts then, and he gestures to Kirk with his head, effectively ending he discussion before Spock can tear into him (logically of course) and explain why he isn’t a brat. Spock isn’t sure whether to be glad or annoyed at this. McCoy is…

Rude. Very rude.

“Jim woke up. He wanted to see Spock. _Our_ Spock, I mean not you. No offense.”

He isn’t offended by the fact that Kirk wants to see his counterpart. The ‘brat’ thing on the other hand… It is probably best to forget about it. Logically, it is of no use to dwell on it.

Spock looks down at the Kirk on the bed and unwillingly his features soften. Kirk does not look like Jim, clearly older and softer, but Spock feels _something_ for him nevertheless when he is in a hospital bed. It reminds him of Khan for a split second and he can’t hold back the sudden rush of anger at just the thought of the name.

This isn’t his Jim, he reminds himself. And this isn’t Khan. Appendicitis isn’t death and Kirk is fine. Alive. Waking up, according to McCoy, clearly recovering.

Spock nods.

“There is no logical reason for me to be offended. Kirk likely has no idea that I exist, and it is logical that he would be asking for my counterpart, considering the nature of your relationship.” Spock stands up straighter and crosses his arms behind his back. McCoy is looking at him incredulously and Spock isn’t exactly sure why. Spock’s statement makes sense, it is factual and accurate, and yet McCoy is looking at him like that. He doesn’t understand it. Honestly? He can’t even work out what emotion McCoy might be experiencing. Sometimes he finds himself irrationally angry at his upbringing because it leads to these situations that he can’t understand. These _emotions_ that he can’t understand.

It doesn’t matter he decides.

He’s just going to leave. As quickly as possible.

 “I will collect _your_ Spock.” At least it means he doesn’t have to be here. Talking to this strange McCoy who is dating _himself_ and likes _bondage_ (if the other Spock is to be believed.) “And I will see that you are equipped with Comms.”

That way he won’t have to deal with McCoy again. McCoy can contact his own Spock or Leonard, or Jim and Spock – Spock can stay as far away as possible. Perhaps in his labs or on the Bridge, somewhere where McCoy is unlikely to go.

“Thanks… brat.”

Spock is going to kill him, he decides as he leaves.

* * *

 

McCoy isn’t sure how he held back his hysterics at the look on Spock Jr’s face. The kid looks absolutely horrified at being called a brat. Offended. As if McCoy had just insulted his mother or the history of Vulcan. He’s pretty sure the only reason he didn’t burst into laughter at the sigh is because this Spock seems far more serious than his own, lacking the easy sense of humour his Spock has developed over the years. McCoy doesn’t really want to be punched by a Vulcan because that would hurt. Way more than he enjoys. So, he holds himself back.

It’s still fucking funny though.

He’s still replaying the moment in his head when _his Spock_ enters the Medbay, fighting the urge to laugh until he cries, if only because he doesn’t want to wake Jim up.

* * *

 

It is amusing to see his counterpart so worked up, Spock thinks. It reminds him of himself when he was younger. He is ninety-four percent sure that it is due to his own McCoy which is… understandable.

And amusing.

His suspicions are confirmed as soon as he enters the Medbay because McCoy is flushed red and his eyes are bright. Spock can tell that he is barely holding back laughter and he raises an eyebrow, curious and fond.

“Now, what has caused your current condition? I assume it is due to your interaction with my counterpart?” His tone is light and curious and McCoy rolls his eyes. Spock thinks that he is adorable and moves closer, leaning to press a kiss to soft, human lips.

McCoy returns the gesture easily. It is a chaste kiss but, seeing as Jim is not involved, that is not surprising. Spock enjoys his relationship with McCoy, it is less full of touch than the one he shares with Jim but no less loving.

There is, he concedes, a lot more verbal sparring and sarcasm but this too he has grown to love. When he pulls away, Spock tilts his head to the side and McCoy gestures for him to sit down before speaking. Rather than pull up another chair into the already crowded space, Spock perches elegantly on the edge of the biobed, careful not to disturb Jim.

“I called him a brat, Spock. You should have seen his face, he was so pissed! I thought I was going to cry Spock.” McCoy’s voice raises as he tells his story until he is gasping for breath again, trying his best not to laugh around the words. Spock is reminded of all the other times he has seen McCoy like that and had he been human he might have found himself a little uncomfortable.

As it is he just basks in contentment.

He can imagine how his counterpart reacted to being called a brat and it explains the petulant expression that he had seen on Spock’s face. McCoy seems to have a way of getting under his skin in every universe. The knowledge is pleasing because he knows that is what made him fall in love in the first place.

His counterpart just hasn’t realised it yet.

“Indeed, he did seem angered.” Spock says mildly in response, wondering if his younger counterpart even realised that McCoy wasn’t exactly wrong.

Maybe he is being a little cruel. Spock isn’t that bad. He is just young, and Spock can admit to the desire to tease because he knows what he was like at that age. Stubborn and prideful. McCoy realises it too and is probably, in his own way, trying to help.

Trying to get Spock out of his shell the same way he always had.

“It was hilarious, he has less of a sense of humour than you ever did. Poor kid.” McCoy shakes his head and Spock can see the fondness in his eyes. He feels an irrational urge to kiss McCoy again because that look makes love bubble up inside of him, but he pushes it away for now.

“He is young still. I am sure it will develop, as mine did.” Spock says with a quirk of his eyebrow and it makes McCoy roll his eyes again. One day, Spock thinks, he is going to give himself eye strain doing that.

“Of course, it will, that’s logical isn’t it?” The teasing is expected, it no longer bites like it might have once. Spock takes pleasure in the fact that they can talk to each other like this.

McCoy doesn’t let love change who he is. Spock likes that about him. The doctor is, and always will be, a grumpy old man and Spock is quite happy to let him be as long as he is their grumpy old man.

“No, but expected, if your counterparts are similar to you and Jim.”

“C’nterp’rts?” Jim’s voice is croaky with sleep and it startles Spock a little bit. McCoy doesn’t even get to respond to him because they are both looking over their lover. McCoy has one hand placed against Jim’s forehead, but only for a moment before Jim bats it away.

Hazel eyes blink rapidly and Jim groans as he pushes himself up, shoving at the sheets so he can sit.  

McCoy is worrying but he doesn’t bother trying to get Jim to lie down again and Jim doesn’t fight him when his lover leaves to get a tricorder. This is their routine, Spock knows by now, it makes both of them feel better.

“Jim. You are awake.” Spock adjusts his position on the bed and smiles at his lover. He is glad to see Jim awake finally, to see recognition in those pretty eyes.

“’Course I am, captain obvious… you two are loud…” Jim mumbles, yawning halfway through his sentence. There is a smile on his face though, stretching his cheeks in a way that makes Spock want to pinch them. At least Jim looks healthier, there is colour in his skin where he had once been too pale.

He looks sunny again. Spock isn’t even sorry when he apologises.

“Our apologies, Jim. And I am not the captain, you are.” He teases, leaning forwards to brush curls out of Jim’s face. The action makes Jim groan and roll his eyes and Spock doesn’t blink when fingers catch his chin.

“Shut up and kiss me, Spock.” Jim tells him firmly. And Spock is loath to say no to anything Jim wants. This is the man he would (and has) died for.

“As you wish.” He murmurs before planting their lips together. It is a far messier kiss than he has shared with McCoy, hot and wet. Jim is needy (as always) and his tongue is soon in Spock’s mouth. Spock plants a hand on the pillow and leans closer to Jim.

He has missed this.

When they part Jim is panting slightly, flushed bright red. There is a familiar look in his eyes that makes Spock shake his head and smile. Behind him he can hear McCoy grumbling and calling Jim a ‘horny devil’. Spock is glad that his husbands are both back. He traces a thumb over Jim’s cheek before Jim catches his hand in a Vulcan kiss, pressing their fingertips together. The action makes Spock feel warm inside. He stares at Jim adoringly for a moment before pulling away.

He might have missed Jim but they are still in the Medbay after all, and Spock won’t do anything more than kiss until McCoy has certified Jim’s health.

Jim obviously knows this because he sighs and leans back against his pillows. Spock can see the change immediately, his mouth becomes set in a serious line and he gives them both a careful look. Spock knows he is thinking about the _other_ universe they had once had a glimpse into.

“You mentioned counterparts?”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we finally get some tos!jim !! though, not as much as id hoped for,,, at least he's awake now and we might even get to see both kirks interacting soon ;)
> 
> this chapter is the longest one yet! yay! your comments keep me going to pls leave one if you like the fic :D


End file.
